By Robert Leslie
LAGOS, April 10, 2014 --- You'd think that for a man who claims to have a direct line to God, a few words to a lowly journalist wouldn't be too much to ask.
T.B. Joshua is perhaps Nigeria's best known healer-preacher. He's a self-styled 'commissioned' voice of Jesus Christ, all-round miracle worker and man of mystery. From his hotel and megachurch complex on the fringe of Lagos, Joshua and his followers preside over a multi-million-dollar faith-healing empire.
All reason enough, on a reporting mission to Nigeria, to seek out an interview with the man himself.
Clearly skeptical of the media, it had taken a week of daily phone calls, emails and even a hand-delivered letter to finally get permission to film a Sunday service at Joshua's Synagogue Church of all Nations.
"...and can you confirm the interview with T.B. Joshua?" I had asked over the phone.
"Just come at 7 a.m.," said a voice, before the line went dead.
AFP's Lagos driver Hassan and I arrive early as hundreds of impeccably dressed Lagosians file into the vast auditorium for the start of an all-day service.
Then my three minders arrive, armed with impenetrable smiles. I'm escorted to an empty dining room where I assume we'll discuss over breakfast the day's filming as well as timings for my interview with Joshua.
Breakfast, yes. Discussion, no.
They leave me alone in the middle of a colossal Chinese restaurant with a "we'll be back to get you."
"I don't really want breakfast…" my voice trails off as I'm left talking to the ornamental fish tank in the corner.
They return after 40 minutes, smiles intact.
"Could we talk about the filming today..?"
"Follow me", says disciple number one, an American in her 30s.
I'm taken not to the auditorium of the church where the warm-up acts are already in full song, but to the presidential suite of the on-site hotel.
"Make yourself comfortable, there's a bedroom through there if you'd like a sleep.." The penny, spinning for the last hour, finally drops.
These have all been elaborate stalling tactics to keep me away from Joshua - perhaps this is how the whole day was going to pan out.
I politely protest: "I really don't need to sleep, I'd just like to…"
The door is closed.
I sit in the presidential suite for half an hour watching the live feed of Joshua's very own television channel Emmanuel TV - broadcast from the Synagogue auditorium a few hundred yards away.
Sunday service at Joshua's Synagogue Church of all Nations. (AFP Photo/Robert Leslie)/
Eventually, with claustrophobic supervision, I'm allowed to film the swaying, singing thousands in the church, and to my surprise, am permitted to film up close with Joshua as he makes his way up and down lines of hand-picked believers. With a touch of his hand, he appears to cure people of AIDS, bone disease, or struck down by a 'family curse'.
Those who have read the script fall dutifully to the ground, caught by a well-practiced line of staff. But others miss their cue, forgetting to cry out as their demons are 'exorcised' and end up stumbling theatrically with the coy look of a child who's just spotted his parents in the front row at a school play.
My handlers go into overdrive. "Film here, a woman who can't walk…"
"Quick, here the prophet is about to rid this woman of her demons.."
Woman wails, Joshua heals, demons are gone.
After half an hour of frantic miracles, Joshua looks tired. I see this as my moment for an interview. "Later", says disciple number two, a young British woman who's worked with Joshua for eight years.
Evil Attacks -- T.B. Joshua followers wait to be "healed" from a range of ailments. (AFP Photo/Robert Leslie)
Lunch on my own in the Chinese restaurant, then five hours observing the megaservice unfold in the megachurch. The man himself finally has his moment on stage, whipping his followers up into a frenzy as he pledges, as the mouthpiece of Jesus Christ, to solve the money problems of his congregation, to deliver them health and wealth on Earth in return for their enduring devotion.
As he leaves the stage, I become more insistent with my minders, reminding them of my long journey from the UK, my patience, my compliance during the miracle line-up.
"I think he's gone over to greet his followers over the road", gesturing towards a tented area where thousands more had been following proceedings on big screens. "Maybe we can find him there."
I'm shown the rice store, the ambulance depot, a workshop and a construction site.
"Is T.B. Joshua meeting us here?" I ask rhetorically.
"If it is his will, hopefully we can find him," offers disciple one.
"Would you like to go to the presidential suite, perhaps have a lie-down?" she asks flatly.
'NO!' I say, a little too strongly. It was getting dark and I had already spent a good 12 hours on site.
"Can you contact T.B. Joshua and find out if an interview would be possible?"
But of course they don't have mobile phones. "If it is the prophet's will..."
By half past seven it's dark, my simmering anger disguised only by sheer exhaustion.
T.B. Joshua "heals" a sick follower in Lagos, December 2013. (AFP Photo/Robert Leslie)
In the day-long game of chicken, and much to my chagrin, I'm the first to blink.
"I have to go I'm afraid" I say.
"That's a pity, I'm sure the prophet would love to speak with you…"
There was never going to be an interview, I knew that. And I knew that they knew that I knew that. But a glimmer of hope had kept me waiting and praying for the incredible.
Now at least I know how Joshua's followers feel.
A follower appears to pass out after her "healing". (AFP Photo/Robert Leslie)
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